Cranky Fibro Girl

Harnessing the healing power of snark

The One Where Cranky Fibro Girl Embarrasses Her Mother

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Because the Universe loves me, I am always in The Right Place at The Right Time to hear conversations like the one I overheard the other day, where some wives were discussing banking their husband’s sperm so that, if something happened to their spouse, the wife could still bear his children.

I was trying to wrap my brain around that idea, because that truly is something you don’t hear everyday, but then I heard this:

“Well, yeah, you’re my husband. If you were brain dead, OF COURSE I’d want your nuts.”

Profession Of Faith

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I know that there has been a lot of change around here lately, so I thought that I, Cranky Fibro Girl, should take some time to reflect on where I stand on the various issues that confront me on a daily basis.

1. I do not believe in peanut butter as a dessert.

2. I do not believe in morning times that begin with a number that is less than 7.

3. I do not believe in bumper stickers.

4. I do not believe in gas station meat.

5. I do believe that wearing a goatee transforms you into the “evil” version of yourself.

6. I do believe that there is almost nothing that McDonald’s french fries cannot heal to some degree.

7. I do believe that my husband pretty much walks on water.

8. I do believe that my couch has magical healing powers.

9. I do believe that crocs and minivans are the gateways to hell.

10. I do believe that there is no such thing as “too many books”. I also believe that there is no such thing as “enough books”.