1. Louis Pasteur invented a cure for rabbis.
2. The walls of Notre Dame Cathedral are supported by flying buttocks.
3. Sir Francis drake circumcised the world with a 100-foot clipper.
4. Moses led the Hebrews to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread without any ingredients.
5. Protons are found in both meat and electricity.
6. The bowels are a, e, i, o, u, and sometimes y.
7. He worked in the government as a civil serpent.
8. The flood damage was so bad they had to evaporate the city.
9. A horse divided against itself cannot stand.
10. Homer wrote The Oddity.
11. Flying saucers are just an optical conclusion.
12. Socrates died from taking a poison called wedlock.
13. Be sure and put some of those neutrons on my salad.
From 1001 Dumbest Things Ever Said, ed. by Steven D. Price
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