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What Jesus Wants

November 9, 2006 By Jenny Ryan 4 Comments

Today dooce referenced a song that sent me flashing back to my early years. She mentions “trying to coax Leta into singing Mormon hymns over the phone one more time. Jesus, he wants her for a sunbeam”. I think that someone, somewhere must have decided that Jesus wants all young children for sunbeams, because I too sang that song, but as a (former) Baptist, not as a (former) Mormon.

However Jesus appears to be keeping up with the times, because yesterday he emailed me. And now, instead of wanting me “for a sunbeam, to shine for him each day”, he wants me to refinance our house with his mortgage company. “Our loan department is trying to reach you One Last Time since previous attempts to contact you all failed.” Apparently I missed the burning bush and the pillar of fire by night, so he had to resort to email.

The times, they are a-changing.


Filed Under: Sometimes Spam Is Funny Tagged With: funny spam

Comments

  1. DK Raymer says

    November 9, 2006 at 9:40 pm

    LOL – I wonder who came up with that ad strategy?! Thanks for the laugh!

  2. tiggerprr says

    November 9, 2006 at 10:03 pm

    Oh goodness. That’s just craziness.

  3. Miss Britt says

    November 9, 2006 at 10:10 pm

    I WISH Jesus would email me. Something simple like “do this and then this will happen”

    Or powerball numbers. I’d take that too.

  4. CRSE says

    November 10, 2006 at 12:38 pm

    Does he charge interest? His rates should be pretty damn reasonable. And if you dont pay, are you forgiven? Because in my mind forgiveness means never having to say forclosure!

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