Cranky Fibro Girl

Harnessing the healing power of snark

Happy Birthday!

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Unfortunately I was a little too miserable to notice before, what with the sinus pain and pressure, and the White Hot Nail Of Agony piercing my eardrum, and The Doctor Who Did Not Believe Me, but last Monday, June 12th, was the one year birthday of my blog!

I always knew I could produce an almost unending stream of words pretty much on demand, but who knew I could come up with enough actual funny stories to fill up an entire year?

So I just wanted to take a moment to mark this occasion, and to thank all of you who read this blog. Because without you, I would just be jibber jabbering out into nothingness.

Here’s to another great year!

We Now Interrupt This Blog For A Very Special Public Service Announcement

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Attention All Guys

You know how you will sometimes be in an extremely public place like, say, standing in front of the arrivals and departures board in the terminal of a very busy airport, and you will blatantly and flagrantly start to rearrange yourself, apparently believing that you are somehow shielded by a special cloak of invisibility?

Well, WE CAN SEE YOU!

We now return you to your regularly scheduled blog.

Who Knew?

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Today has been a mixture of tutoring some students in Spanish and getting ready to go out of town for a conference.

I guess getting ready for my trip has put me a little on edge, because by my last tutoring session my answers to the student’s questions had become a bit flippant and sarcastic.

This caused him to stop, put down his pen, look at me, and say, “Hm, apparently smart ass is catching. Who knew?”

Once An Overachiever…

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After officially having a migraine for one week and one day, I finally stepped out of my denial today and admitted that it wasn’t going to go away on its own. So I called the doctor and was able to see both my chiropractor and my massage therapist today.

As I was lying on the table being worked on, my massage therapist said, “I’ve never felt a [some muscle in my neck] this tight before.”

“Well,” I replied, “I always like to excel.”

Lemmings

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lem·ming n.: Any of various small, thickset rodents, especially of the genus Lemmus, inhabiting northern regions and known for periodic mass migrations that sometimes end in drowning.

If every single person in your office is wearing the exact same blue dress shirt and red power tie (as was the entire table of 6 businessmen seated next to me at lunch the other day), then I’m wondering just who is left to be impressed that you’ve dressed for success?

The Better Part Of Valor

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Knowing that when your husband is nearing the end of the game, “God of War”, and is snarling out phrases like, “What is the point of this?”, and “This is absolutely ridiculous!”, and, “This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever seen!!” to you, an avowed non-gamer, as he is trying to climb up the Rotating Pole Of Spiked Death, that he is not the only one facing a trap in that moment.