In an examination room waiting to meet my new doctor, and listening to him talk with the patient in the room next door:
Doctor: “…stabilizing the spine…”, “strengthening the core muscles…”, “…distributing weight evenly over both feet when you move…”
Me: Oh good, it sounds like he really knows what he’s talking about.
Doctor:”…don’t rush getting off of you pain meds unless you want to experience mood swings, cramps, uncontrollable shaking, (and a host of other awful symptoms of withdrawal)…”
Me: Huh, his voice really carries, doesn’t it? I need to remember that when he and I are talking.
Doctor: “…so orgasm is going to look totally different…”
Me: HELP! TMI! TMI!
Me: Extremely Important Mental Note: In order to avoid similar horrification in the future, I will now be requiring all my physicians to communicate their diagnostic questions solely through the art of expressive dance.