(my trainer, raising the incline level from 0 to 7 (!!) on the treadmill yesterday for a little interval training)
“I’m gonna raise your cardio if it kills me. Or you. Whichever comes first.”
And my trainer is not the only thing that’s been kicking my ass lately.
I’ve spent the past year doing tons of internal work to clear up a lot of the stuff surrounding my depression and decrease my medication. So I arrived at a really good place only to find that my depression had been masking some huge, intense, and at times, paralyzing anxiety.
So I’ve pretty much spent the past week just wanting to punch life right in the face, along with trying very hard not to peel off all my skin and leave my body. Needless to say, that hasn’t left a lot of time or energy for the funny.
What doesn’t kill you may make you stronger, but before it does that it sure as hell puts you through the wringer.
Just passing through and will tread lightly. I love the notion of depression masking other things, or rather, the expression of the recognition of the notion of depression masking other equally destructive forces.
The French post this sign at railroad crossings: “Un train peut en cacher un autre.” – One train can hide another.
Very subtle and insightful. Your post. Not the sign.
We’re SO living in parallel universes. I have been taking to the treadmill whenever I get downright pissy. Um yeah, I am going to be SO hot. Again, it’s all about avoiding the hostage situation….
Jean Browman--Cheerful Monk says
Anxiety might not be fun, but I’ll take it over depression any day. When I was developing software, I opted for the projects no one else knew how to do. Yes, it was scary, but I know I need challenge in my life if I’m not to be depressed. So my motto was “I’d rather be scared than bored/depressed.” It might not work for everyone, but it sure works for me.
Oh sweetie. Welcome. My therapist says its like layers of an onion, just because there is another skin underneath, you can still work through it baby.