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A Tiny Moral Quandary

November 5, 2006 By Jenny Ryan 15 Comments

When we first moved into our house seven years ago, our next door neighbors were wonderfully welcoming. They lent us tools to use when we worked in the yard, they helped us repair our roof when the ice storm hit, and they brought us tons of freshly canned fruits and vegetables that they grew in their own backyard.

But as time went on we started seeing them, especially the man, less and less. He was already quite elderly when we met, and was suffering from a number of different health problems. And now it’s been about a year since I’ve actually seen him at all. So here’s my quandary: I think he might have died, but there is really no good way to find out whether or not that’s true. Because no matter how I’ve tried to formulate this question in my mind, it always comes out sounding like some variation of,”So, did the old fart finally kick the bucket”.

And what makes it worse is that I have seen a new man over there, quite frequently. And I can only assume that he lives there, because almost every time I’ve seen him he’s been standing outside the front door, smoking in his underwear. I’m not a smoker myself, but as far as I know being almost naked is not a regular part of smoking protocol. I have friends who smoke, and not once have I ever had a conversation with them that went like this:

My friend: “Hey, Jenny, do you mind if I go out on your porch and smoke a cigarette?”

Me: “No, not at all. Go right ahead.”

My friend: “OK, great, thanks. Just let me take me take off my pants.”

So there you go. Monica and Rachel had Ugly Naked Guy; we’ve got Nearly Naked Smoker. I can live with that.

Filed Under: Playing Well With Others, These Are The Days Of My Life Tagged With: neighbors

Comments

  1. Mad Kane says

    November 6, 2006 at 4:58 pm

    LOL! That’s quite the image you conjure up.

    As for how to find out if the guy died, you can always ask the nearly naked smoker how his dad is doing.

    On second thought … maybe not.

  2. Administrator says

    November 6, 2006 at 6:00 pm

    It’s quite a sight to see! Thanks for stopping by:)

  3. CRSE says

    November 6, 2006 at 10:59 pm

    Oh I hate these types of things. Is he dead? not dead? we went through this last year when we didnt see our (totally rockin’) next door neighbors for like a whole year. Finally in June neighbor wife tells us neighbor hubby was in jail! (it was actually a horrible story and i know they all say it in there but he really was innocent. youd have to understand our town…..) It only made me love them more…..i do concur however. I had smokers over this weekend and nobody took off a single stitch of clothing!

  4. Miss Britt says

    November 7, 2006 at 11:08 am

    ROTFLMAO

    ooops, sorry, let me compose myself here

    Um.. just a thought – did you know the previous old guy’s name? Look him up online – if he’s died, his obituary should show up. 😉

    Monica and Rachel… he he he he….

  5. Administrator says

    November 7, 2006 at 12:44 pm

    I had smokers over this weekend and nobody took off a single stitch of clothing!

    See, I KNEW I was right about that! 😛

  6. Administrator says

    November 7, 2006 at 12:45 pm

    Hey, Miss Britt! Thanks for stopping by.

    You’re right-I can do a little online research and see if I find anything.

  7. Dana says

    November 7, 2006 at 1:44 pm

    Jenny, I didn’t know taking off my pants was an option! LOL

  8. InterstellarLass says

    November 7, 2006 at 3:16 pm

    I must confess I danced in my front yard, wearing only my underwear, at night. After quite a few beers. But never smoked…

  9. DK Raymer says

    November 9, 2006 at 9:46 pm

    Jenny! You’re a Miss Marple wannabee – you know how to solve this one. You Google the local Obituary column, or the county public records for a house sale, or check the name on the mail box! Hey, I live in a tourist town. That’s normal operating proceedure here, cause people move in and out of here every month! Good luck on solving this one…

  10. tiggerprr says

    November 10, 2006 at 11:57 pm

    Let’s just hope this doesn’t end with you poking him with a really long stick.

  11. Administrator says

    November 14, 2006 at 9:37 pm

    Jenny, I didn’t know taking off my pants was an option!

    I’m always glad to educate and offer people more options 😀

  12. Administrator says

    November 14, 2006 at 9:38 pm

    Jenny! You’re a Miss Marple wannabee

    Oh yeah-thanks for reminding me! 🙂

  13. Administrator says

    November 14, 2006 at 9:38 pm

    Let’s just hope this doesn’t end with you poking him with a really long stick.

    AWESOME!!

  14. Administrator says

    November 14, 2006 at 9:39 pm

    I must confess I danced in my front yard, wearing only my underwear, at night. After quite a few beers. But never smoked…

    Well, as long as there wasn’t anyone there with a camera…

Trackbacks

  1. Using My Powers for Good by Jenny Ryan says:
    December 3, 2006 at 8:49 pm

    […] This weekend we had dinner with one of The Gamers, and somehow we got on the subject of next-door neighbors. I told her about Nearly Naked Smoker and she said, “When I was in high school our next door neighbor would come outside in his underwear to get the paper and yell at our school bus as it came down the street.” […]

  2. The Best Things I Heard This Weekend | Using My Powers For Good says:
    May 14, 2009 at 1:46 pm

    […] with one of The Gamers, and somehow we got on the subject of next-door neighbors. I told her about Nearly Naked Smoker and she said, “When I was in high school our next door neighbor would come outside in his […]

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