So today I had to go back to the dentist again, for the third time in nine days. And while that did indeed mean more drilling (or as I like to think of it, being poked with sharp, hot sticks), the good news is that it also meant more novocaine and more nitrous oxide.
As I was lying in the chair, floating along in my own little dream world, I heard the dentist explaining to his assistant why he was employing a particular technique at that time, and how that was going to save us all a lot of time and effort in the long run.
“I’m killing birds here,” he said, “Multiple stones.”
“Multiple stones,” agreed the assistant.
And somehow, despite the drilling, and the drugs, and the four hands and seventeen million dental instruments currently occupying my mouth at that moment, The Grammar Snob in me was still able to register that something was wrong with what they’d just said. And so, struggling up from my murky internal depths I found the strength to mutter,
“No. Muldible birds.”
“It’s muldible birds, dot stodes.”
Apparently, you just can’t keep good grammar down.