Grammar Snob Strikes Again!
Author: Administrator
Category: Grin and Bear It, The Naked Truth
So today I had to go back to the dentist again, for the third time in nine days. And while that did indeed mean more drilling (or as I like to think of it, being poked with sharp, hot sticks), the good news is that it also meant more novocaine and more nitrous oxide.
As I was lying in the chair, floating along in my own little dream world, I heard the dentist explaining to his assistant why he was employing a particular technique at that time, and how that was going to save us all a lot of time and effort in the long run.
“I’m killing birds here,” he said, “Multiple stones.”
“Multiple stones,” agreed the assistant.
And somehow, despite the drilling, and the drugs, and the four hands and seventeen million dental instruments currently occupying my mouth at that moment, The Grammar Snob in me was still able to register that something was wrong with what they’d just said. And so, struggling up from my murky internal depths I found the strength to mutter,
“No. Muldible birds.”
“What?”
“It’s muldible birds, dot stodes.”
Apparently, you just can’t keep good grammar down.
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9 Comments so far
1.
Dana
September 26th, 2006 at 1:34 pm
HA HA HA HA. That was great, JR!
2.
Administrator
September 26th, 2006 at 2:13 pm
Thanks, Dana
3.
CRSE
September 26th, 2006 at 11:50 pm
That is truly awesome. I obsess over these things too no matter what my state of consciousness (and let me tell you my friend, few things in life are uglier than watching a drunk idiot pick a fight with a stranger over the mispronunciation of the word mischeivous)
4.
Momish
September 27th, 2006 at 12:00 pm
Too funny, but I totally understand!
5.
Administrator
September 27th, 2006 at 7:24 pm
few things in life are uglier than watching a drunk idiot pick a fight with a stranger over the mispronunciation of the word mischeivous
I can totally see how that could happen.
6.
Administrator
September 27th, 2006 at 7:25 pm
Too funny, but I totally understand!
Thanks. I may be weird, but at least I am also entertaining
7.
Anthony
September 28th, 2006 at 9:30 am
Good grammar is tough to supress, but I’m not sure I’d be too quick to correct someone who has a live drill in my mouth.
8.
Administrator
September 28th, 2006 at 9:56 am
but I’m not sure I’d be too quick to correct someone who has a live drill in my mouth.
Yeah, see, you would THINK that would occur to me too, but no.
9.
David
September 28th, 2006 at 10:38 pm
Well, that’s not really a grammar (syntactical) issue, but the massive cultural illiteracy and lack of rational thought that allowed that dentist to completely invert the meme is staggering.
It’s just another example of the snowballing cultural illiteracy we face in this country.